The phrase “Somewhat satisfied” should be taken behind the shed and crushed
Dull response options such as “Very good” and “Somewhat satisfied” make me sad because they lack a “directedness” that gives a question its value.
What does it mean when someone selects “Somewhat satisfied”?
I don’t know.
I’ve been told that “dull response options” are necessary for ensuring accuracy. But the “necessary for accuracy” rationale is borderline propaganda, spread by methodology nerds to hide the fact that they couldn’t think of more creative solutions.
How do you excise the dullness from your surveys?
Consider the “museum tour guide” model.
Instead of silently wandering around the museum, a great tour guide, faced with countless items and finite time, is selective.
They have a clear idea of what they want people to focus on.
When it comes to writing survey questions, you should, too.
Don’t water things down under the veil of impartiality.
Be 100% clear about what you need to know.
Then ask about that.
Example:
During a recent Roast, I analyzed a post-purchase survey asking, “What led you to our store today?”
The options ranged from channels such as "Influencer", "TikTok", and "Facebook" to purchase reasons such as “I’m buying as a gift for someone else.”
I made two changes.
First, I advised splitting the question into two: one focused on the channels and the other on purchase reasons.
Second, I wrote a more concise set of choices for the latter.
It looked like this:
“What best describes the nature of your purchase today?"
Purchasing a gift
Buying for my household
Renewing my subscription
Another response (open text)
This question is easier to answer, and addresses the brand’s key question about what motivates a purchase.
Importantly, the “Another response” option allows for periodic updates, akin to a museum tour’s Q&A session (“Any questions about things we didn’t cover?”).
When people book a Roast, I ask them to complete a form with the question, “What is your business goal?”
Without a clear goal, your surveys will be filled with dull response options.
And we don't need more of those in the world.
They’re just making us sad.
Need help crafting the perfect ‘museum tour’ for your brand or agency?
Consider booking a $45 Survey Roast. Just submit a request and I’ll get back to you in 24 hours (M-F).